Some reflections from my life as we meet the half way point of the year..

Half way through the year I often take the time to reflect on the year so far and what a year it has been already.

This time last year I was deep in fear, pain, chaos and confusion as my marriage came to an end and I was navigating all that comes with that.

I felt completely de-stabilised, scared and was going through a dark night of the soul that felt like it would never end.

I wasn't sure who I really was anymore and most of my time was spent pleading with The Universe to make things easier for me.

There were so many challenges emotionally, financially, practically, energetically.

At some points I wondered how I would make it out in one piece.

The thing is I wasn't supposed to make it out in one piece.

I was supposed to let the pieces of me shatter.

To let the fragments disperse.

Then to gently allow divine order to put things back together for me, with me, through me.

This happened when I finally surrendered and released the grip on all I knew.

When I let the chaos reign and trusted that it was all in my highest good.

As Caroline Myss says. "The moment you come to trust chaos, you see God/The Universe clearly. Chaos is divine order, versus human order. When the chaos becomes safety to you, then you know you are seeing God/The Universe clearly."

That chaos was necessary to lead me to where I am now.

I haven't felt so happy, free or true to myself in a long time.

I am different.

Softer.

More feminine.

More powerful.

More boundaried.

More fierce.

More loving.

More open.

And it is showing with every gift the Universe has brought me so far this year.

This is for you.

Trust in the chaos, don't try and cling on to the old.

Trust when things need to go.

Trust when parts of you are needing to die for the new to come in.

Trust in the liberation of those parts of yourself that can only be forged in the fire.

I believe in you.